Dumping DEBT

Prov 22:7
7 The rich rule over the poor,
and the borrower is servant to the lender.

Herbert and I will celebrate 12 years of marriage next month. Our first 2 1/2 years of marriage were pivotal in setting up the marriage we have today in many ways. Yesterday Herbert shared how we DUMPED DEBT early in our marriage.

How the debt started:
* We had car debt.
* We put the honeymoon on credit card! Woo-Hoo!
* We moved into a little four-plex and had no living room furniture. So, because my husband wanted to take care of me, he told me to pick out some living room furniture:-) And I was so proud of my choice. A maroon, hunter green and navy plaid sofa and matching love seat. Plus, a free coffee table, end table and lamps to match. We charged all $999 to our credit card.
* Student loans from college.
* Our used washer and dryer went out so we charged a new set on a 12 month no interest plan.
* Every married couple needs a computer right? We thought so. We charged one on a 12 month no interest plan.
* Herbert discovered he was self-employed. We owed the government $1000 in taxes.

So, we had some debt stacking up and we knew that we didn't like the feeling. Like all areas of our life, we decided to apply biblical principles to our finances. We became serious about getting and staying out of debt.

Here's what we did to get out of debt in 2 1/2 years:
* We tithed. We gave offerings.
* We spent very little on food.
* We spend almost nothing on clothes. Herbert shared the story a funny story about my work pants:-) Yes, I was cheap then---I'm not quite so cheap now:-)
* We didn't go on vacations.
* We always went to the dollar theatre. Herbert likes to joke that a new release to us was when a movie hit the discount dollar theatre.
* We said NO to A LOT!

We got out of debt except for our house and have stayed debt free since. We won't go back to debt again. Herbert's message was so good. Please take time to listen if you need encouragement in the area of debt.

Webcam Wednesday with Cale

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Message Here

Thoughts from my hubby's blog today!

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Family Is A Priority

Occupational ministry can be tough to balance with family life. There are sermon preparations, weddings, funerals, counseling, budgets, bills, building to build, building to maintain, people going through crises, board meetings, preaching, hiring, firing, leadership, ministries to launch, programs to stop, missions, outreach, the poor and the list goes on and on. Occupational ministry can be a 24 hour job if you let it. There is always something to do. There are always people going through problems or a crisis. There are always decisions that need to be made. It can be a challenge not to put the ministry ahead of your family.

When it comes to this issue, there are some pastors who are lazy and use family as an excuse not to work hard. This bugs me big time. I think pastors and church leaders should work super hard. We don't hire lazy people at People's Church. There are other pastors who are workaholics and neglect their families for the church. This also bugs me big time. I don't think someone is a spiritual giant because they are always at the church doing ministry and neglecting their family. I'm the first to admit that it can be tough to find the happy medium, but it can be achieved. There have been seasons that I've really struggled to find the balance, but I think I do fairly well with this overall. More importantly, my wife says I do a good job in this area, and that's what really counts.

Tomorrow I'm going to share some things that I do to make my family a priority.

And yes, it's true. I do think he does a great job in this area!

Family + Weekend = Great

Before I know it another weekend rolls around and then passes by. We had a fun and eventful weekend at the Cooper house. On Friday I looked into the living room and saw this---Case with the Wii remote trying box.

He was so proud of himself! Go Case, Go!

We were really excited to have a visit from Papa Tim on Friday and Saturday. He arrived after our family date on Friday night. He was on his was to Texas and stopped over for the night. Here is a picture of Caris showing off Papa's boots on Saturday morning.

Cade loves to spend time with Papa. I told Cade that "the Claw" was coming to visit and Cade said, "The chicken will save the day!" Cade loves his chicken outfit and wears it everyday. He put it on for Papa as he tried to save the day---Papa has a "Claw" move that he uses to tease the kids. I really wish I took a pic of Cade in his chicken outfit.

Another highlight from Papa's visit---he is a VERY generous tooth fairy! All 4 kids now have heavier pockets.

On Saturday afternoon we went to our cousin Ebony's house for an early Thanksgiving meal. Man, those ladies can cook. It was soooo good! It was even better to see the family.

Sunday was powerful as we continued the series GREEN PEACE. Herbert had some great thoughts about finances.

Your self worth is not determined by your net worth.
What you live for is more important than what you live on.

Listen here if you want to know how Herbert shops, it's pretty funny.

We had over 90 salvations and were over 1000 people bigger than last year. God is faithful!

Then it was football as usual as I relaxed. Once the kids woke up it was homework and lessons and eating and playing and...you get the picture.

I finished my night with a trip to the store. Not so much fun but very needed!

It was a great weekend!

Webcam Wednesday

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Check out the Virtual Roundtable info at Lori's Blog Leading and Loving it.

A Great Church

A great church is...
...a big church, a small church
...a city church, a country church
...a progressive church, a traditional church
...a church of flashing lights, a church of stained glass
...a place with small groups, a place with Sunday School

...A GROUP OF PEOPLE WHO PROCLAIM THE GOOD NEWS OF JESUS CHRIST AND ARE DRIVEN TO BRING OTHERS TO HIM!

What makes your church great?

GREEN PEACE

The new series GREEN PEACE started at People's Church. I am full of anticipation that God will help people in the area of finances. I am passionate about living with financial peace and want for everyone to experience a life free from $ trouble stress.
Did you know that the Bible talks about money and possessions more than heaven and hell together? The Bible talks about money and possessions from cover to cover.

Why? Because God knows the stress and trouble that sometimes comes with money. Money is the #1 cause of divorce. But God wants you to have finances without trouble.

Prov 10:22
22 The blessing of the LORD brings wealth,
and he adds no trouble to it.

God's Blessing is finances without trouble.

This is a powerful message. Herbert is passionate about teaching financial principles from God's word. I encourage you to listen to the message here. It really is a powerful message full of Godly and practical advice---and Herbert's sense of humor.

The Rockstar Bowler

I love to listen to the conversations between Cale and Cade. I am sure that they wouldn't know what to do without the other. They share a bedroom, play, eat, talk and fight together. They are best friends. Although Cale now has a friend from school that he refers to as he best buddy. Cade questioned this at first but seems okay with it now.

I wanted to share some of their recent conversations that have made it to my favorite list. A few of them have been shared on facebook but I wanted to share them with my family too.

The Rockstar
Cade: Cale, you are the biggest Rockstar ever!
Cale: No Cade, God is the biggest Rockstar ever.
Cade: Ya, you're right. God is the biggest Rockstar ever.

The Bowler
Cale and Cade were bowling on the Wii and this is what I heard.

Cale: Hey Cade, one day God will beat us in bowling and that will be funny.
Cade: God always gets strikes.
Cale: Ya, he even gets turkeys. (A turkey is 3 strikes in a row.)
Cade: Of course, he can beat anybody.

The Dollar
While leaving Wal-mart, the kids and I were stopped outside by a gentleman. A table was set up displaying wooden crosses. A group of men were collecting money for a recovery ministry/school. The kids had been saving their money and just bought something for themselves. Cale had $2 left over. He was going to put it back in his bank. However, I could see this look in his face after the man talked with us about his ministry. It was the same look he had after he gave his money to the homeless man awhile back. He asked if he could give the man a dollar. I heard the boys talking once we got in the car.
Cale: Cade, I just saved their school.
Cade: (He just looked at him.)
Cale: Ohh (big sigh here) I feel so good now.
Cale: Mom, I feel so good after giving that man my money.
Me: I'm proud of you Cale. Doesn't it feel good to help others? And you know what, it makes God's heart really happy.
Cale: Ya (another dramatic sigh)

Side note: The man asked Caris if she loved Jesus and she shook her head and said NO!

It's a Make-Up Thing

Hey Ladies! Today I want your input. I want to know what beauty products you use and love. I have some products I use routinely but I also am not faithful to one brand. What skin care line do you use, what brand of make-up works best, anything! I want to know. I haven't used very many brands and don't really know how to use most make-up correctly. Teach me your ways oh ladies!!!

MIRACULOUS

We had our MIRACULOUS service yesterday at People's Church. God did miracles! You can listen to Herbert's message here. I am enormously thankful that I get to serve a God who can accomplish what is humanly impossible. I am thrilled that I get to serve God's people through ministry. It is humbling to hear what people are going through on a daily basis. As much as I would like to, I am unable to fix their situations BUT I know that God is more than enough to transform their lives.
God is more than able to...

* Restore the broken marriage
* Give courage to make the tough decision
* Heal physical sickness
* Replace depression with joy
* Bring loved ones into a relationship with him
* Speak wisdom into a failing situation
* Break addictions from a life
* He is more than enough all the time in every situation

He may not answer our prayers the way we want him to BUT he will always answer our prayers with what's best for us.
The greatest miracle of all happened as 162 people gave their lives to Christ! Thank you Lord for doing the miraculous in people's lives yesterday!

The first 6 years!

Herbert and I were married for 6 years before we entered the world of parenting. We cherish those 6 selfish years together when all we had to think about was each other. Life was fun, a whole lot of FUN!
In fact, we talked about our life before kids while on our date this week.
We don't have many pictures together but this one is from a year ago. The year we added our 4th little one to the Cooper Clan.

10 Things we loved about our life pre-kids!

1. We could leave the house whenever we wanted, even if it was past 8pm.
2. We loved to play tennis together. We haven't done this since we've had kids unless you count Wii tennis---I'm not very good.
3. We enjoyed Friday morning breakfasts together at Scramblers before he left town and before I had to get to class. We also enjoyed some late night breakfast buffets at Shoney's.
4. We both finished our degrees and Herbert started Herbert Cooper Ministries while I was in school.
5. We were able to set ourselves up for financial success. Paying the price early on so we can play now.
6. We could sleep in and enjoy lazy mornings. We could come home from a long day and cuddle on the couch without interruptions.
7. We loved our date nights (we still do)!!! We would usually go out for dinner and then enjoy a movie at The Palace, the $1 movie theatre.
8. We spent many evenings at the great coffee shops and houses where we would talk, read or play games.
9. We loved to eat whatever we wanted at any time of day without a thought about what it would do to our waistline, something we can't do now.
10. We had 6 years to focus on each other without the little ones needing us. We learned more about one another, our love grew deeper and we set our marriage up for a successful family.

There are so many other things we love about our first 6 years together! We wouldn't trade our life now for our life then BUT we certainly wouldn't have planned it any other way. Those 6 years are priceless.

The God Filter

In continuation of yesterday's blog, EMBRACE YOUR SUPERwoman, I am going to go into more detail about what I call The God Filter. The God Filter is the tool I use to make sure my priorities are in order. Every activity or task I begin must pass The God Filter Test. Some questions I ask myself...

* Does this activity fit into my priorities of God First, Others Second, Self Third?

* What are my motives? Why do I want to participate in this activity?

* What is the end result going to look like?

* Will this activity be detrimental to who or what is most important in my life?

* Does this activity have eternal value?

Scenario Examples:

Am I going to obsess over having a perfectly clean house at all times even if it means my kids are walking on egg shells, living in a house with a short tempered mom who is stressing about keeping it clean? Or, am I going to let go of some of the perfection in order to have a house of fun where the kids experience joy while they play? *** The priority is my kids and not my house.

Will I shut down my to do list when Herbert gets home so we can enjoy our time together or will I let him do his thing while I continue my lists of tasks that can wait until tomorrow? *** I will shut it down to invest in my marriage and friendship with Herbert. There are times when tasks need to be completed while he's home BUT it is not the rule. Our relationship comes first, then the other stuff.

Should I take on another position at the school even if I already have a full plate? Should I resist saying no because I would feel badly? *** I should say NO! Just because they need help doesn't mean I'm the person who has to do it. I love to help others and but taking on too many voluntary responsibilities takes the joy out of all my responsibilities. If I have too much to do, I can only do them mediocre. I want to do less with excellence.

They need another teacher in the kid's ministry. Should I volunteer? *** I would be volunteering one extra hour a week to make a lasting difference in the lives of kid's. My one hour investment a week will make an eternal difference. That is an easy YES!

A group of friends are going out for coffee and want to come. Should I go even though I've already had meetings or appointments 3 nights this week? *** I really want to go because I love my girl time with my friends. My time away with friends is always refreshing for me and makes me a better wife and mom BUT I also need to say no until the next time. My husband and my kids are a priority over my friends and so I need to invest my time with them during this busy week.

The scenarios could go on and on and you probably have some examples floating around in your head too. The God Filter keeps me from some potential disasters and allows me to stay on course for success in daily life. I'm confident that creating some criteria for your own personal God Filter will make your life easier and more enjoyable.

SUPERwoman

I am a wife, mother, daughter, friend, pastor's wife and I am a SUPERwoman. Not "thee" Superwoman, but the newest form. I am a SUPERwoman because I know that I "can't do it all" and I "can't have it all".

The Ladies Connect group at People's Church meets on Tuesday mornings and this week's lesson was titled EMBRACE YOUR SUPERwoman. I wanted to share some thoughts from our discussion.

The first appearance of Superwoman was in a DC comic. Lois Lane dreamed that she had gained superpowers after a blood transfusion from Superman. As followers of Christ, we too have been changed by blood, the blood of Jesus Christ. Through his blood we receive forgiveness of sin and eternal life with God.
Eph 1:7 In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God's grace.

It is through Christ that we can truly be SUPERwomen.

The idea that you can be a woman "who has it all" and "does it all" is a huge myth. That type of Superwoman only exists in our imaginations. It can be easy to accept what we see superficially as reality. Forms of entertainment have had a huge amount of influence in the area of creating false realities. We should be careful not to don't idealize people we don't know and make them the false standard.

Trying to fulfill the idea of the "Superwoman" who has the successful career, volunteers for community service, serves in her church, keeps her home beautifully decorated and clean at all times, sends hand written letters, cooks every meal, brings up healthy children who always look like a million bucks and never fight and is always ready to make hot love to her husband is impossible to attain 100% of the time. And we certainly feel failure and disappointment if we try to do it on our own.

The beauty comes when we realize that God created us in his image to be SUPERwomen, SUPERwomen of God who live a life of excellence in him. The Proverbs 31 woman gives us a glimpse of what it is to be a SUPERwoman of God. If you're like me, you have cringed a time or two when reading about the Proverbs 31 woman. Maybe this will help. Just remember that the details of her specific tasks are different in our era today. It is the principles that are timeless.

The Proverbs 31 woman is...
* Trustworthy
* Good to her husband
* Works diligently
* Manages her resources with wisdom.
* Plans ahead to think and prepare for tomorrow.
* Is kind of heart and generous to those in need.
* Provides clothing for her family.
* Watches over her household.
* Speaks wisdom.
* Fears the Lord.

How can translate this in our lives?
First, set your priorities.
God First * Others Second * Self Third
Second. Choose not to do it all. More is less. Do a small amount with excellence rather than everything mediocre. In other words, do 5 things the best you can rather than 20 things halfway.
Third. Live in Community. Reaching out for help doesn't make us weak, it makes us human. We need one another. The local church is a tremendous source of community through corporate worship, community groups, serving in a ministries and sharing life together.
Fourth. The God Filter. Does this activity have lasting value? Example: Is it of value to work non-stop at having a spotless house if our kids and husband don't feel at peace in that super clean home? Or is it of value to let go of perfection so that our kids can experience joy while playing and messing things up a litte? Am I fulfilling God's desire when I do this activity?
(I will share more on The God Filter tomorrow.)

When we make a deliberate decision to throw away the false reality of "The Superwoman" and decide that we are going to be the SUPERwomen God created us to be, we will find purpose and joy in life. Easier said than done, I know! But, when we free ourselves from false standards we will experience a more joyful life.

Looking out my window...

...I see the beauty of fall. Leaves changing from green to brilliant oranges with red leaves here and there. It makes me think about the creation lessons we've been sharing in the Ventureland 3/4 class at People's Church.
***You made the world and everything in it. Psalm 89:11

It is a big job to get the kids ready and out the door for the 1st service on Sundays but I wouldn't do it any other way. There is something special about investing in these precious 3 and 4 year olds each week. I think about them throughout the week and wonder what their days are like. Are they feeling love from other people? Do they remember that God loves them more than they can imagine? Do they think they are special? I do, I think they are God's beautiful creation. I know that He loves them more than I can comprehend and I pray that He helps me to love them just as He would. Each week I am in the midst of world changers who are just beginning their journey with God. I want to do all I can to help them know him more.

Thank you to all of our volunteers who pour into our little ones at People's Church. Your heart to serve is making a difference!

Look At Me

Caris is very much into mimicking me right now. She wants me to put my "chapstick" on her. I am impressed with her ability to walk in my heels. Her joy in having piggy tails is super cute. She has an interest in girly things like never before. So, it didn't surprise me to see her walk out of my room last week with her face painted. She said with great enthusiasm, "Look at me mommy!" I said, "How cute Caris. Now it's time to eat breakfast."